... stupid TV talent shows?

Sigh.

I am annoyed.

All of these talent shows are just merging into one big Simon Cowell driven multi-million empire at the expense of repetition and untalentless people. 

I didnt watch any of Britains Got Talent this year but I've just watched a couple of clips on Youtube and seen that a guy, Sean Sheenan, chopping wood made it to the semi finals. TO THE SEMI FINALS! So out of the hundreds of thousands that audtion, this act was the cream of the crop in this country? Bloody hell fire. The barrel is well and truly scraped.

I don't understand why singers are allowed on this show to begin with. Thats what XFactor is for right? And plus the two formats of the show are the same, its like watching the same show.

And yet, we buy into these fad shows, reality TV, cringeworthy viewing. Don't get me wrong, I used to love these shows when they first came out but the winner of American Idol this year debut single went to number 24 in the US charts. Is this the world saying "we want a change?"

When are we going to have shows with intelligence and substance again?!

... all the hype over Wayne Rooney?

Now I must admit, I'm not the biggest football fan. I have sat down and watched a game or two and I am with someone who is so much of a football fan, that I generally pick up on all the interesting bits.

What I find shocking is the hype over Wayne Rooney. I'm not going to deny the fact that the man is an amazing football player, however, how must the other players feel when everyone and even the commentators turn round and say "Rooney isn't playing, there is a high chance we will lose".

Talk about having a lot of faith in the rest of your players! Its like saying we should expect a really bad episode of Family Guy if Quagmire doesn't make an appearance, Destiny's Child without Michelle or making a Victoria Sponge without the Jam! Yes it would be missed, but it shouldn’t really make much of a difference. It is absolutely ludicrous.

That we as a nation should do, is not put all our eggs into one basket and start having a little faith in our other players. There is nothing more disconcerting than hearing your team is going to fail without a particular person. You are seriously setting yourself up for a fail if you keep that attitude. I would hate to have been playing on the England team when Wayne Rooney "broke" his ankle, I'm pretty sure I read somewhere that "England had no chance". All I would say is thanks for believing in me. There is no "Rooney" in team!

There are plenty of other fantastically skilled (and fantastically over paid) players in the UK at the moment. In the words of George Michael, "You gotta have faith". This much pressure on one person can't be healthy either, look at all the famous melt downs of Christmas past:

Britney Spears - Shaved her hair off

Lindsay Lohan - Likely hood of her doing another movie is ZERO.

Whitney Houston - if you haven't seen it, check out this link

All I can say is yes Rooney is a good player, but start believing every the other 10 players trying to win the match for you. 

... Jedward?

Now, I am a colossal fan of X Factor. Every Saturday from September through to mid December, I am glued to my tv watching this show. I have honestly scheduled my social life around it and even my own birthday celebration, I am that much of a fan. Watching the rise of Leona Lewis, that other guy Leon (dropped faster than Jordans underwear) , Alexandra Burke (love love love!!) And the latest winner Joe McElderry (Yawn), it’s been some fantastic TV.

One thing that really got to me this particular season was this bungling duo who managed to charm the pants off Cheryl, Louie, Simon, Dannii and the rest of the nation. And I must admit, there was part of me that was secretly looking forward to these tone deaf, rythmless dancers to jump up on stage and make absolute fools of themselves for the sake of entertainment. Once the world woke up and realised that we are actually watching a talent show and these 2 lacked any form what so ever and decided to vote these two out, one was hoping they would wither away and join the rest of the X Factor rejects and make the occasional Cameo appearance.

However, these two must have the same manager as Jade Goody (god rest her soul), as they seem to just be popping up everywhere and indorsing everything. Somehow they managed to pull together a single which brought out Vanilla Ice back from the grave with intent to use this as an attempt to relight his mediocre career, but that’s another hate for another day.

Last thing I heard is that the gruesome twosome will be going on tour with another X Factor joke Eoghan Quigg and that really say’s it all. I would like to bitch some more, but I am in a good mood. So all I will say is I hope that these Z list celebrities will eventually disappear into a deep dark bottomless pit where they will be long forgotten like Jodie Marsh and the 7th member of the Pussycat dolls (seriously, look it up, there were 7 originally).

Jedward, your 15 minutes of fame ended 10 hours ago, please take the hint and do the rest of the world a favour!

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